Whoa!!! Review from 12 Rounds

Guest Mon Mar 23, 2009 12:30 pm

I want to slap or ever said this...

Review from Australia about 12 Rounds.

12 Rounds
Review by Sean Lynch

John Cena in 12 Rounds

If there is one this you can say about Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, it's that the guy has charisma.

Sure, he might not be walking the Oscar red carpet anytime soon - but he sure as shit is an entertaining chap to watch on screen.

However, on the other end of the "Wrestler Turned Actor" spectrum - you have John Cena.

This is a man with about as much charisma and on screen presence as a can of SPAM...

And if Hollywood hadn't figured that out after his previous "Star Vehicles" and "Rap Career" - then the woefully bad 12 Rounds will most certainly keep Cena in the ring where he belongs.

The flick follows the muscle bound WWE champ as New Orleans Police Detective Danny Baxter.

When Baxter stops a brilliant Irish thief, Miles Jackson, from getting away with a multi-million-dollar diamond heist, Jackson's girlfriend is accidentally killed.

Exactly one year later, this criminal mastermind escapes from prison and sets about on his revenge, taunting Baxter with a series of near-impossible puzzles and tasks.

Twelve to be exact.

Twelve (unexplained boxing themed) rounds Baxter must complete in order to save the life of his fiancee.

On paper, 12 Rounds sounds like a perfectly serviceable (if not slightly lame) action-thriller which mixes a little bit of Blown Away and a dash of Speed.

Yet somehow the mix of an embarrassing low "Straight to DVD" looking budget, "Year 12 Media Video" quality acting, and the fact that director Renny Harlin insists on filming Cena running (despite the fact the guy is so hilariously "ripped" that running makes him look like a wombat fearing for it's life) makes 12 Rounds nothing short of a joke.

Not a funny joke either - more so one of those jokes that the guy in your office that nobody likes tells... the one you laugh at politely before pretending to answer an imaginary phone call.

Credit where credit is due though. Aidan Gillen (despite a fairly dodgy Irish accent that comes and goes) delivers the closest to a real performance as the evil Miles Jackson, while Renny Harlin does deserve a pat on the back for making the film look and feel much more epic and expensive than it really is.

But Cena's lack of anything that remotely resembles talent - teamed with the fact that his cop suit (which looks like it is about to burst) makes him look like a stripper - ultimately makes 12 Rounds lose any semblance of quality.

Excuse my grammar - but this film is ia film that is incredibly terrible. That is, 12 Rounds is so terrible it is truly incredible.

There is a reason Hulk Hogan quit the acting game, there is a reason The Rock currently has a #1 Box Office hit in Race To Witch Mountain - and there is a reason John Cena will never be seen in Hollywood again... and that is 12 Rounds.

0.5 out of 5 Shocked

Firstly you idiot, It's fisher not Baxter Evil or Very Mad

The movie looks GREAT! I can't wait to see it lol.

**Shelton Benjamin** Mon Mar 23, 2009 2:30 pm

It's the problem with these so-called "critics" they voice their oppinion at bout a film and puts people off it... then wonder why it's not as successful as it could or should have been.

I've always said, being a critic isn't a real job, sit there and review a film of what YOU think of it... That film might be a rubbish film to him, but to the next person it's their favourite film, it's just one guys oppinion, and the fact he got Cena's character's name wrong; just proves how good he is at his own "job".

I'd love to see him say it to Cena in the middle of the ring... See what he has to say then...

My Oppinion: Check it out for yourself, don't listen to morons that can't even get the name of a character right... Oh, and hasn't got a real job...